Brian Griffin is Dead, Hopefully the Series Will Come With It

And so I type out this blog with a heavy heart. Seeing as the oh-so-beloved (apparently) Brian Griffin was hit by a car and dieded in the latest episode of Family Guy. I first discovered this horrifying fact from my buddy, who sent me this lovely text:

“I know you don’t care about family guy but holy shit, they just killed off one of the main characters. I guess that means the show is close to the end.”

Now, upon reading this, I couldn’t help but make a stab and say: “Meg?” Of course I knew it wouldn’t be Meg, but with how she’s treated on the show, it’s always a possibility. I knew immediately that it would be Brian. It only makes sense. Peter will never die. If Lois died, then Peter would likely cause a financial collapse in the family because he’s retarded and put the family in poverty. Meg and Chris wouldn’t die because why would they? Stewie was an interesting thought, as I could potentially see him as the one who met a tragic fate, seeing as he’s always dabbling with feats of technology that are beyond the capability of someone his age. It all came down to Brian; seeing as he’s a dog and at the ripe age of seven (last I knew), it would only make the most sense to kill him off, since, let’s face it, he’s the least important character of the group. He’s a dog. Only the family and very close friends of the family would really care. If any of the humans were to die, it would affect the dynamic of the entire show. Characters would (probably) act differently around the mourning characters and the show would (probably) take a darker tone to finish out its course. But with a dog? They’ll eventually get over it. Depending on the state of a family, I would most likely believe that people would be more inclined to be depressed over the death of a family member than a pet.

So, what am I getting at by stating all of this? Simple: shut the fuck up. I would appreciate if everyone would shut the fuck up about Brian’s death. He’s a dog, and moreover, he was just a character that Seth MacFarlane could relay his liberal messages to the audiences with without putting his name out there to create controversy for himself, as opposed to the show in its entirety. His death is not that significant, shouldn’t be that significant, and most of all, it’s the least surprising and/or controversial. I can’t help but feel that MacFarlane is just using Brian’s death as a way to create a sudden impact that will hopefully attract audiences toward the show through curiosity of how the show will play out without him. My theory: it won’t change at all. Perhaps they’ll mention his name a couple of times. Perhaps there won’t be as much political bias as there was the past few seasons beforehand. Or, and I find this laughably likely, they’ll show Brian in the afterlife, watching over the family in an effort to make peace among the heart-broken audience that experienced his tragic death. But hey, I don’t know what MacFarlane is planning. I haven’t watched the show in almost a year; nor do I plan on watching it after hearing about this. But seeing as I have that one buddy who can’t stand to be without it, I’m sure he’ll tell me about it eventually. What I’m curious to know is if my theory is correct, because if there’s one thing I like, it’s being correct.

I know I shouldn’t complain, but it just seems so silly to me. Almost as if the audience were comparing Brian’s death to Old Yeller, with the latter being much more tragic, and much less contrived. I only wonder how long the mourning will last. I’d say maybe two weeks. Give the series a couple episodes to adjust to having one less character. Eventually, people may forget that he was even there. Hey, now there’s more emphasis on the “Guy” in “Family Guy.” No animals were harmed in the making of this series… maybe.

RIP Brian Griffin: May you make a cameo in some other media in the future. Do I smell a sequel to All Dogs Go to Heaven?

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