SPEEEEEEEEEEED GRAPHERRRRRRRRRRRR!

I always announce it just like that.

It’s an interesting show… once it hits episode fifteen. Everything before that made it so hard to watch. It literally took everything I had not to drop this by episode ten. It was just so bland. Everything was solved in a single episode, the characters are boring, and the artwork is not pleasant to look at.

I like to compare the execution of the plot of this anime to Mega Man. You encounter a bad guy. You defeat him. Level Complete. Next boss. This is the formula for the first half of the series. Enemy after enemy after enemy comes out of the woods to kill off our main character, Saiga, only to fail at the last second, usually through means of fallacies or cliches. You don’t know a lot about these enemies other than they’re insane and are willing to work for their own twisted desires. It just seems like mundane game.

The plot actually becomes interesting during the second half of the show, when the past of Suitenguu is revealed. The big plan starts unwinding and everything doesn’t just feel like a level in Mega Man anymore. It feels like all the ends are coming together in a huge, end of the world-like fashion. It certainly made the show more entrancing… but it was still illogical nonetheless.

I’m not sure how I feel about the ending. Nothing is really solved. It’s just an obligatory “happy ending” at face value… when nothing of the world is really known. It seems to skip time to some degree. How long? I don’t know. It seems like everything’s okay… but why is it okay? Japan’s bankrupt… right? All of the corrupt people are dead, right? So, what happens from there? You’re just going to leave this unexplained, anime? Right.

Speaking of corrupt people, why is it that every person with power is corrupt? What is the likelihood of every person with some sort of signature power being corrupt enough to be willing to let things be corrupt? It doesn’t make sense to me. There has to be SOMEONE in power who isn’t corrupt! These hundreds of people are all corrupt. And for what? Sex? Sex really does control everything, according to this anime. Money? But what do you do with money? According to this anime, you spend it on membership fees to a club that allows you to indulge in disgusting sexual fetishes. So, once again, sex. Wow. Real deep.

All of the characters are boring. Except Suitenguu. His back story actually made me pity him. An actual emotion arose in me! That scene when he meets his sister again for the first time in several years? Heart-breaking. Though, in my case, it’s more like saddening. For the record, I have a sister. MY OPINION IS BIASED. DON’T LISTEN TO ME.

The main character is horribly dull at first… then he becomes just dull. He’s the signature “DO WHAT’S RIGHT BECAUSE IT’S RIGHT” protagonist that you see in every story. The difference? He’s in his thirties. SO DIFFERENT! The female protagonist, Kagura, gets the silver medal for most underdeveloped character in this show. She literally doesn’t have a personality, and doesn’t really show any side effects to being raised in what is basically isolation. She’s also completely and totally generous and willing to sacrifice her life for anyone, despite the shit she’s put up with… and she’s fifteen. She’s horribly unrealistic. But the gold medal goes to some bitch whose name I can’t recall. She’s a psychotic stalker who wants the main character’s dick (and gets it) through any means possible (sleep rape, anyone?). Nothing of her background is explained. Her desire for the main character is unexplained. She’s just there. And crazy. Just a terrible anime in regards to character building, except Suitenguu… maybe.

The art is shitty. It’s really hard to see any of these characters as “appealing,” especially when you compare them to the concept art. Kagura’s hair sometimes looks like seaweed. Some of the actions these characters make look robotic. And the action scenes? Barely exist. Where this anime truly shines is making the characters look disgusting. And seeing as this show includes humans who can shapeshift into monsters and weird taboo shit, it’s safe to say Speed Grapher gets an A+ in that department. I still can’t get over how radically different the style of animation is from the concept art… it’s truly disappointing.

A rather bland viewing. Speed Grapher gets interesting during the second half, but the plotholes only get bigger and more varied. The characters are stocked and shipped. The art is not very appealing. The ending is devoid of reason. What is the appeal to this show? Suitenguu. He’s actually something! He’s not something at first, but he becomes a something! Watch it just for him! Err, well, the doctor isn’t terrible, either. Mmm. It’s just an all-around “ehh” show.

Personal Score: C

Critical Score: C-