Top 10 NFL Players Who Have Earned a Championship, but Probably Won’t Get One (2019 Edition)

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About five years ago, I wrote a piece on then-current NFL players who most deserved a championship win on their resume based on their on-field performance, but were unlikely to get one due to their team’s success or their current age. Since then, seven of the ten players I included onto the list have retired—only one of them ended up getting a Super Bowl ring. With an ongoing game such as the NFL, revisions are necessary in order to keep lists interesting and current, honoring players for their craft while also instilling a sense of history. Four seasons and seven retired players seem adequate enough to update this list. Continue reading “Top 10 NFL Players Who Have Earned a Championship, but Probably Won’t Get One (2019 Edition)”

My Expectations for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate After Its Final Nintendo Direct

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When the trailer for this game revealed itself for the first time, I was intrigued. When more detail was provided at E3, I was genuinely hyped. The Nintendo Direct that followed (revealing King K. Rool/Simon Belmont) made me hyped even further than I could imagine. All was pointing up for the series in my mind, which was something I wasn’t used to after the eventual apathy I had gained for the series following my “creative differences” with Smash 4. All that had yet to be revealed, which would ultimately seal the fate of the game for me was whether or not it would have a dedicated solo campaign, a la Adventure Mode or something similar. With the Nintendo Direct that occurred today, the last one to feature Ultimate specifically, we got an answer. Continue reading “My Expectations for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate After Its Final Nintendo Direct”

Day Thirteen: Seitokai Yakuindomo Movie (MotM 2018)

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I could write a lot about this film, but that would mean re-treading the same ground as every other adaptation of the Seitokai Yakuindomo manga ever, because it’s so little different that I may as well copy-paste various observations from old posts. Continue reading “Day Thirteen: Seitokai Yakuindomo Movie (MotM 2018)”

Day Eight: Mad Max: Fury Road (MotM 2018)

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Real life got a little ahead of me. This one will have to be quick.

Mad Max: Fury Road is one of the best films I’ve seen to date. The characters, the sets, the chaotic energy of the camera and the entire energy of the film is a sweet breath of fresh air. Not only does it make itself known through great visuals, but the weight of the characters decisions and motivations make for something impactful by the very end. Acting was phenomenal by all and it is, by far, one of the most thrilling films I’ve seen in my entire life. Dunkirk wishes it could be this intense. Continue reading “Day Eight: Mad Max: Fury Road (MotM 2018)”

Early Impressions: URAHARA [Dropped]

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(This series has since been dropped. There will be no entry for it for the foreseeable future.)

Three episodes in, it ended up not meaning anything.

With this gone, I am now down to only one seasonal anime to view on a weekly basis. If anyone has something to recommend that is not complete garbage, please feel free.

With the first episode of URAHARA, I was charmed by its attempts at appearing somewhat off. I had anticipated that it would take this incredibly avant-garde color palette and premise to places that would end up being intriguing to dissect. Through three episodes, I saw no signs of anything of the sort, so as my patience continued to wane, as did my interest in continuing along with the series. Truth be told, I didn’t even watch three whole episodes, only two and about twelve minutes of the third, only to skim through the rest to see if I would miss anything. I wouldn’t.

Three girls are within their own world of Harajuku (I believe it was called) when aliens come out of nowhere and start taking various artifacts of human culture to have for themselves. A talking shrimp puff that doubles as a scarf for a mysterious little girl explains that the aliens cannot think creatively for themselves, so they steal landmarks of creativity from other planets to compensate for it. The three girls are given powers (I genuinely cannot remember how or why) that allow them to combat these thieving aliens and the rest, well, kinda plays out like a villain of the week, Saturday-morning cartoon. All the clichés are present with none of the charm from the characters or consequences of the plot at hand.

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Skipping ahead from my normal structure, art is something that made me both stay at first and leave at the end. It’s very simplistic design, with a lot of rough-around-the-edges style of animation that made it seem incredibly amateurish. Once again, I was suspicious as to whether the series was doing this purposely as a form of parody or satire, which made me question the style they presented (lots of girly, light colors). With no evidence of anything of the sort, I can say with almost certainty that the animation is simply atrocious and the studio behind it takes numerous shortcuts that reek of low budgeting and laziness. Hell, characters don’t even have the same succinctness to their jawlines scene-after-scene.

There are some things I could say about the story of URAHARA, but there’s a deterrent to my further elaboration: what story? Aliens rob Earth of their culture, then a giant bubble surrounds a certain portion of the girls’ town and then… they do stuff. They do normal girl things and hardly worry about it. They talk to each other and develop their friendship. And at the end of each episode, an alien conveniently swoops in and starts shit, only to be defeated without much effort. That’s about as much as I can remember articulate. Simply put, it’s pretty dull, with only the expectation that better things are yet to come leading me along with this nonsensical production.

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It would at least be tolerable if the characters weren’t cardboard cutouts of… anything, really. There is so little differentiation between these three girls that it barely matters what any of them do. One is a blunt, yet shy fashionista (who I liked at first). Another is a soft-spoken and absent-minded accumulation of girliness. And the last, I guess she’s the “main” one, is the main character. Any veterans of the industry can immediately fill in the blanks with only “the main one” as context, sadly. Altruistic, you before me, normal in almost every regard, nothing stands out except their “chosen one” background. These three have little expression to them, nor do they have a lot of intriguing chemistry. Chemistry they have, but it’s nothing one hasn’t seen before. Almost akin to the chemistry one sees between background characters that’s never elaborated on.

I thought I’d picked a sleeper when the synopsis of this anime popped out at me. The burst of color, absurdist premise, and the hunch in my brain made it seem ripe with potential; for the first episode, I still believed it to be there. Time has gone by and nothing has shown for it. It’s dull and empty. Unbelievable that a plot this strange and an environment so colorful and bouncy can be this boring. I almost want to make my own URAHARA and fill it with strange symbolic gobbledygook parodying Sailor Moon and Cardcaptor Sakura, while also establishing a point of emphasis on the way girls with superpowers in anime are expected to behave in the eyes of the general public. Oh, what could be with enough work.